Here is your card

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While not a fan, I appreciate the Darwin awards which “salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who accidentally remove themselves from it”. I sometimes describe myself as a person who have a low-tolerance for stupidity which is not really far from the truth. Note the highlight as that does not mean that I don’t delve in stupidity myself. I know that I do so more often that I would like.

Jeff Foxworthy/Bill Engvall, whom are both American stand-up comics, have a less honorable version for their routine in ruthlessly ripping apart common stupidity. The routine goes wherein they pay attention common real-life actions and instances that ends up with the quote “here is your [stupid] card”. I would pay homage to that routine for the small things that nag me every day.

Today I received another of those not-so frequent (thank you Fate) SMS from an unknown number that automatically launches to a greeting cum keeping-in-touch content:

God am jun mzta sanka nka detno ngaun c rudy 2. / Good morning Jun how are you where are you currently assigned this is Rudy.

Yes the human and English translation did not have any punctuation as the original message did not have one. This already tripped several alarm bells for being moronic. How hard is it to write human-readable non-encrypted words that can still fit the 160 character limit of a standard SMS? Since it was still morning and I am still in a good mood I opted to send a short reply in case the sender was waiting near his phone for a chance to get re-acquainted with Jun who for all we know was the only friend he ever had when they were growing up but for some reason his family moved out just when he was teaching Rudy how to socialize without becoming a menace to society. Alright that was over the top but I was getting ahead of myself in being riled up. My answer was:

Sorry, you sent the message to the wrong number.

And then I got this in return:

Nd aq wrong nm # sya ang nagbegay ng # nya skn. cno poh sla. / I didn’t send to the wrong number # He was the one who gave his number to me. Who is this?

This tripped several more bells that pumped my rage level from inconvenienced to peeved. I seriously considered wasting another peso in sending a reply but realized that it probably won’t matter and could only snowball at that point. I am just taking consolation in the thought that Rudy is still hovering near his phone and trying to wait for a message from his long lost best friend that has now opted to disown him. Mwahahahaha.

ciao!

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